I'm sitting at some lake in Texas... It really helps being here. It makes life seem really simple. And just as I write this, a flood of depression came flooding in. I just don't want to be alive anymore. I need to think of a better way to end everything... and just as I wrote this, Dalton told me he couldn't hang because something "came up." I think it's amazing how much people don't want to be around me. I think it's funny that I asked him earlier if we could get together and chat, but I always get a 'no' from everyone. If I were to die, I wonder how fast I'd be forgotten about. I'm so easily overlooked and forgotten about as is. It would mean the world if I just had one friend... that's it. Someone that wanted to hang out, someone that saw through my mess, someone that trusted in me enough to open up, and vice versa. Each day I see myself giving up more and more and each day my thoughts of suicide get worse. Makes me wonder which day will be the day it all becomes too much, gets so bad, that I'll be gone. This journal, this blog, is literally the only thing that I have that is here for me. I'm out of sight, out of mind to everyone else.